-Terrorists practice a radical form of Islam: twice the murdering, half the bathing.

-They enjoy blowing themselves up, and we enjoy blowing them up.  You'd think we would get along better.

-Their favorite military hero is Napoleon Blownapart.

-They will riot and kill each other over a few stupid cartoons.  We should make more of those.

-Terrorists want to sneak explosive liquids onto airplanes.  If you see any children on your flight, tackle them and confiscate their juice boxes.

-Our latest intelligence indicates that the Koran is really just a bomb-making manual.

-The word "martyr" is just a fancy name for "crappy fighter."

-If a guy is being overly sensitive to racial profiling, he may be a terrorist.  Strangle him with your shoelaces just in case.

-Terrorists act all hurt if you draw Mohammed, flush a Koran, or bomb mecca.  What babies.

-They hate us for our freedom.  And our large american penises.